Shots in the Head

Today was shot in the head day. Yes, you read that right. Every 6 weeks I get trigger point injections for migraines. I get about 20 of them in the back of my head, my neck, and shoulders. It is not fun, and it is certainly the least exciting part of my day, but it helps tremendously and generally lasts most of the 6 weeks until the next one. Or at least 5 weeks and I suffer greatly the last week until the next one. My head gets very numb immediately after he injects the steroid and stays that way most of the day. It will start to wear off about 7:00 and then I will start to hurt and need a couple ice packs and go to bed early. I have an appointment with my personal trainer tomorrow, and clearly completely forgot I had this appointment today when I made it. Probably not a great idea, but it is too late to cancel now. She is pretty good if I tell her I can’t do something. She knows I have migraines and fibromyalgia, so she will just have me do a different exercise instead.

Well, I am in a real mood with my daughter’s school. Again. They seem to have a real need to micro-manage us parents. OMG! First of all, I got no less than 6 emails that there was a PTO meeting yesterday. I shit you not. So… are you trying to tell me there is a PTO meeting on Monday? Do you think they are trying to get people to attend? Geez! And then there is the “Fundraiser that’s not a fundraiser”. If we donate this much money, it will prevent them from ever having a bake sale, if we donate $xx it will prevent us from selling wreaths and wrapping paper, etc, etc. Yep, I doubt it. You will still try to make us sell stuff. Forget it. I put in my years as a Girl Scout leader and sold several thousand cookies. Been there, done that. Until you come up with something people really want to buy, I’m out.

Also, yesterday we got an email to make sure we pull up “all the way to a certain spot” when we drop off in the morning to “ensure a proper flow of vehicles”. And don’t drop your child off until they are fully ready to exit the car. OMG! You really have to waste an email on this nonsense! Why don’t you just shoot me in the head? What a serious waste of time for the writer and the reader. Give me a freakin’ break. Also included in that email was a “social media challenge”. You’re gonna love this. They want us to sign an agreement to add the school’s Facebook page to our Facebook. And if our children are over 13, to add the school to their Instagram. Ummm, no. I’m not wasting my time to print it, sign it, and send it back. Again, give me a break. I have better things to do. I already have them on Facebook, but now I want to delete them for spite. If my kid was 13, maybe I wouldn’t necessarily let her be on Instagram. Did they ever think about that? Hmmm?

Lastly, I want to strangle the yearbook club advisor. She really needs to get her shit together. Seriously. Let me tell you why. All the other clubs have nice calendars of when they meet. Nope, not her. 3 weeks ago, we had a date on the calendar for the yearbook meeting, but it wasn’t on the school calendar, so we weren’t sure if there was a meeting. I told my daughter I would call the school and find out and told her to listen to the announcements. I called the school and there was no meeting listed. Also, no announcement, so I picked her up at the regular time. On her way out the door, a friend asked if she was coming to the meeting. Sure enough, there WAS a meeting. Terrific! She missed it. I sent the advisor an email to inquire why it wasn’t posted on the website, announced, or why the office didn’t know about it, and could she please provide a calendar. No reply.

Today there was supposed to be a yearbook meeting. It WAS listed on the school calendar, but there was no announcement, so Hailey thought it was cancelled and she sent me an email to pick her up after school. Again, walking out the door, the same friend asked if she was coming to the meeting. Again, there WAS  a meeting and she missed it again. Because I drive 20 minutes one way to school, I was already in the parking lot waiting by the time the friend told her there was a meeting and this continues to happened. Hailey was pissed off and said she isn’t staying on the yearbook staff. I sent another email to the advisor referencing my message from 3 weeks ago and kindly asked her to get her head out of her ass and reply. I really just asked her to get herself organized, which probably wasn’t nice either, but at this point, I don’t really give a hoot.

Anyhow, that’s my story and I’m sticking to it. End of rant.

Keeping Busy

The last few days have been busy. Friday morning we woke up to a couple inches of snow. Much too early for snow around here, but now it is nearly melted. As far as I’m concerned, a white Christmas is all we need, then it can go away and spring can come. I hate snow and cold weather. I had a lot to do inside on Friday, so I didn’t even set foot outdoors once I saw that nasty white stuff. (Although it was pretty on the trees.) I did laundry, paid bills, scrapbooked, and stashed away all my daughters warm weather clothes. Definitely no need for those now. I rearranged her closet so the sweaters are front and center. Maybe most of them will get worn this year and not be hanging there with the tags still on them come spring. Ugh… girls. It’s about 35 degrees and she is outside on her scooter right now. Never mind that she is just getting over a cold. She did the same thing last weekend and refused to wear a hat and gloves. I told her she was going to get sick. She didn’t listen and guess what? By noon on Sunday, she was sick. Yes, I know, getting cold doesn’t make you sick, but it doesn’t help when you are a kid in school with constant germs floating around. Schools are petrie dishes. Well, she’s better now, so she is back to being invincible. Until the next cold.

Saturday we went to two craft fairs. One was at our church and it was quite good. Much larger than last year. I got a bunch of DoTerra essential oils. I love that stuff. The lady was selling it a wholesale prices. Excellent! I also discovered some sugar scrub and lanolin for my daughter for her dry skin. Her hands get horribly dry this time of year and she has stubborn spots of excema on the back of her legs. The dermatologist has given her 4 or 5 different medications. Some work for awhile and some don’t work at all. They are steroids, which I don’t like putting on my kid. I’m anxious to have her try this in her next shower. I just have to remind her to use it. She’s a little stubborn and will accuse me of nagging her most likely. I swear, she is 10 going on 16. She’s already got that teenager attitude going.

This morning we went to church. It’s the first time I’ve been able to go since my mom passed. I made it until the silent prayers and I prayed for healing and understanding for myself. And then I started crying. But I was there, and I’m getting out of the house much more often. The days are getting a little easier and a little more normal and I’m grateful. Thank you to those who continue to read my blog. I can see I don’t have as many readers. I guess I’ve been Debbie Downer lately, but I’m trying. Thank you for reading and for those who have sent comments. I appreciate it.

Busy Day

Today was a busy (and somewhat normal) day. I went to the gym (yeah me)! I didn’t even make any attempt to chicken out. I’ll admit I wasn’t happy with the lady who said she hasn’t seen me for months and went on and on when I told her my mom passed away. She eventually said “I assume you don’t want to talk about it”. Nope, I sure don’t.

I did a bunch of scrapbooking this afternoon and got quite a few pages done. I got all the pages finished from my vow renewal and it turned out really cute. I’m anxious to get myself caught up, so I can start working on the pictures of my ancestors.

Our holiday cards and calendars came today from Shutterfly. I’d like to think I will be early and write out those cards, but I will do them on Thanksgiving as usual.

Tonight a builder we have been working with came over to show us a proposal to build us a house. We decided we had better compare a couple builders before we made a final decision. The guy who came over tonight was too expensive by several thousand dollars, so we are going with the original plan, which is the house we like better anyhow. Now the goal is to sell our house in the spring so we can get this whole thing done!

Politics for 10 Year Olds?

It’s been one month today since my mom passed away. I had my moment of breakdown when I heard a sad song on the radio. My good intentions of making it to the gym today didn’t happen. Oh well, there’s always tomorrow. Yep, I’ve been saying that for a month. I know she wouldn’t want me to dwell in sorrow the rest of my life. I have to pick myself back up and get on with my life. I’m trying, I really am.

Today I started catching up on my scrapbooking. I need to catch up over the winter. Today started on our vacation to Maui from last December. My husband and I renewed our wedding vows for our 20 year anniversary, so I have TONS of pictures. I didn’t have a lot of time, so I only got a few pages done, but it was good to get started. I have fantastic scrapbooks for every year of my daughters life, so I hope she loves them when she is an adult because I have so few pictures when I was a kid. I haven’t even started 2018, so I better get going before it is 2019!

On the way home from school today, my daughter told me an interesting story about recess with her bestie. I took her with me to vote yesterday and she accidentally wore the “I voted” sticker on her jacket today. Her friend asked if she went to vote with me and asked who I voted for. She said she didn’t know (although she did). Thankfully she is smart enough not to discuss politics – I taught her well. The friend said she knew who her parents voted for (it was the opposite of who we voted for). Hailey wanted to drop the subject, but the friend persisted and asked if her parents (us) were glad that “so-and-so” won. Hailey got really uncomfortable, but the kid wouldn’t shut up. I told her if she brings it up again, she should tell her friend that you don’t discuss politics or religion – ever, unless you want to get in a fight. Then I told her about something I saw on facebook that said it doesn’t matter who won the election, what matters most is what happens in YOUR house, not the White House. This is what we need to teach our children, and apparently other adults. I was disappointed that the parents of Hailey’s friend apparently had so much impact on their 10 year old that this child was bugging the crap out of Hailey on the playground about politics. At one point she said that one side sucked! I won’t say which side because I’m not going to state my political views here. I’ve only met the mother once when she dropped off the friend for a playdate, so I don’t want to judge, but 10 year old have no need to know anything about politics.

Additionally, I think the ads on TV are ridiculous. They spend more time bashing each other than telling us what they are going to do for us. This doesn’t put them in a positive light in my eyes. If anything it makes them just as bad as the candidate they are bashing. These days in politics, it has really come down to the lesser of two evils, if you ask me. They rarely live up to their promises anyhow. I think they all stink. My vote will go to the first man or woman who gives stay-at-home moms an income. Who’s with me?

Improving Day by Day

Yesterday is the first day I didn’t cry. I guess that’s an improvement. It is a month tomorrow since my mom passed away. I’m working on a book about my mom and it seems to be helping to re-live some memories. It sort of makes me feel like she’s still here. I’ve got 42 pages so far. I just don’t think it’s going to be one of those 300 page books. I messaged some of my mom’s cousins and friends on  her facebook page to get some stories about her, but of course, I’m not their friend and my last name is not the same as it was when I was a kid, so I don’t think they know who I am, and they aren’t reading the messages. I’ve also asked her two brothers for stories, but they can’t seem to manage to even call or return my email. Really?! Well, I guess since they have been unable to have a family Christmas since my grandma died in 2007, I guess they can’t be bothered to make a phone call either. I suspect I’ll never see either one of them again since my mom is gone. Oh well.

As I said, I didn’t cry yesterday, but it doesn’t mean I didn’t cry today. I have a medical test tomorrow and I’m nervous. I wish I could talk to my mom so she could tell me not to worry. It will be an uncomfortable test. It won’t last long, but I’ve been dreading it for a week. I just want it over with. I know she would say “it won’t last forever” or “this too shall pass”.

I got an email today from my daughter’s school principal asking how we were doing, which I thought was very kind. I appreciate that we haven’t been forgotten even a month later.

Church/Holiday Cards

I was bound and determined to get up and start getting back to church this morning. Somehow that extra hour of sleep didn’t kick in for me. Or anyone else in the house. My daughter was getting ready for Sunday School and my husband was getting dressed to drive her. I started having one of my sad moments and I started crying and decided I didn’t want to go. It was 4 weeks ago today that my mom died. Every Sunday morning, I keep reliving the moment my husband came in and told me she died. I repeat it in my head and I get paralyzed with sadness. Am I going to feel like this every Sunday for the rest of my life? This morning I just decided I wasn’t ready to be among people. I knew I would sit in the pews and just cry. In addition, I have joined a Compassionate Caring group at church that goes out to meet with the shut-ins and there was a meeting today. I missed the first meeting last month because it was the day my mom died. I didn’t know if I was prepared to go to the meeting and explain why I missed the first one, or frankly, if I’m ready to go meet with elderly people. My mom wasn’t by any means elderly, and she will never have the chance to be elderly. That’s not it. I just don’t know if I’m ready to go sit with people who I am supposed to be listening to and being compassionate, when right now I have a lot of problems of my own. I don’t to bring anyone down.

Anyhow, by the time we would have been halfway through the service, my daughter started feeling really sick. The poor girl has come down with an awful cold and was laying on the couch all day. Then I started feeling pretty awful too. I hope I’m not getting something. I literally just got over a cold a week ago. It’s cold, rainy, windy, and downright crummy outside, so I guess we didn’t need to go out today anyhow. We’ll try again next week.

I spent much of the day working on my holiday cards and a calendar I make every year for the grandparents. I had kind of a hard time making the calendar knowing my mom won’t see it. She always loved it. I’m super early on getting my cards done. I order them through Shutterfly and just put pictures on. I used to hand stamp them every year, but that was when I had time. They will be here before Thanksgiving and I’ll spend that night writing them out. I send 80 cards every year, but last year I received half of what I usually get in the mail. Has social media replaced holiday cards too? I actually saw someone post their card on Facebook last year! Really?! That’s totally uncool. Keep sending the cards people! It’s seriously the only time of the year you get more cards than bills. Other than when someone dies and you get a handful of sympathy cards. But that is way less merry. You’re going to have to trust me on that one.

Productive

Today I actually had a productive day. I got 2 loads of laundry done while my daughter was at swim lessons. We had our front door refinished because it was getting baked by the sun and looked like total crap. It looks really nice now. Gotta fix up the shack to sell it in the spring. My daughter and I both had haircut appointments today. She looks so cute and fresh with a few inches cut off. I look exactly the same, except without the split ends. I think I need to go get some highlights or something.

Then we went over the mall and bought some snow boots for her so we will be prepared when the inevitable snow begins to fly. We’ve been stuck before with no snow boots and had to run out and get some. Not cool. Next we hit up Joann’s and they had scrapbook paper on sale 12 for $2. Score!! I bought $50 worth of paper! And I had a 25% off coupon. Woohoo! I have a lot to scrapbook with all the photos my mom saved from my ancestors.

I’ve also decided to start writing a book about my mom’s life. She led a very interesting life. One of the last things she said to me was that she was loving reading my blog. She said that I wrote so many things as a kid, she thought that I was going to write a book when I grew up. So I decided that I would give it a try. I don’t know if anything will ever come of it or if it will get published. I started yesterday and so far I’m only on page 26, but if nothing else, it’s helping me heal.